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In the book “When the Cradle is Empty” by John and Sylvia Van Regenmorter we look at chapter 8 this week: “Faith and Infertility: The Nagging Question”.

John Van Regenmorter says, “In the correspondence we receive, the ‘Why’ question is raised more than any other.”  He goes on to explain the frustration that accompanies the why with infertility.  Why can some people get pregnant at the drop of a hat even those not trying or not equipped to raise a child while others struggle to have a baby when they have all intentions of raising Godly children?  He lists 5 different possibilities of why God may allow people to go through infertility:

“Possibility #1:  A Fallen World   I’m not sure that every time our path takes us through disappointment or trouble God is trying to teach us a specific lesson.  [Philip] Yancey (author of Where is God When it Hurts?) believes suffering may be a general message to all who are willing to hear that we live in a fallen world which needs help.”

“Possibility #2:  To Show the Results of Disobedience”  John makes the connection that there may be some cases of infertility that are a result of poor lifestyle choices but for the majority of people God is not punishing us for some sin we committed in the past.

“Possibility #3:  To Test Our Faith”  God wants us to have faith in Him when things are good and when they are not.  Dr. James Dobson is quoted saying, “This determination to believe when the proof is not provided and when the questions are not answered is central to our relationship with the Lord.”

“Possibility #4:  To Equip us for Service   One woman said “When God allowed me to suffer from infertility, He also invested in me with a new gift that I did not have before-the gift of compassionate understanding and sensitivity for those who are facing what I have faced.”

“Possibility #5:  To Glorify God”  How you handle your trials can affect other people.  They may see how although you struggle you remain strong in your faith and begin to be interested in a God that has that power.


I liked how John ended this chapter:  “The answer is that most of us may never know for sure why God allowed infertility to be a part of our journey.”  That may seem like a non-answer but for me it has been freeing.  I have spent so much time wondering why and what I could have done different that this answer frees me to move on and accept that “it is what it is.”  This is the life I have been given.  There has been good and there has been bad.  Now I can choose what to do next.