When we considered doing domestic adoption there were a few things I really worried about. What if we never got picked, what if the Birth Mom changed her mind, what if the Birth Father shows up later and wants the baby. But what I couldn’t really wrap my brain around at the time was what it would look like 5 years down the road, or ten.
Our daughter’s Birth Mom was the daughter of one of our neighbors. The neighbors still live there although the Birth Mom has moved elsewhere. So we run into Birth Grandma, Birth Grandpa and Birth Dog (a golden retriever) off and on. Yes, I never considered the role of a Birth Dog in my daughter’s life.
As years go by I have let go of many of my preconceived “Kodak Moments” and filled them in with reality. For Christmas our tradition has been to decorate the Christmas tree and the rest of the house the day after Thanksgiving. Joey and I put the tree up and the rest of the kids help put on all the ornaments. This year my husband had to work so he was not there to participate in the annual tree decorating but when I went out to hang the wreath on the door our daughter’s Birth Grandma was out walking the Birth Dog. With her was their oldest son, visiting from out east where he works and is in graduate school. I invited them all in so they could spend some time with Lexi.
So decorating our tree this year was me, my six kids, our daughter’s Birth Grandma, Birth Uncle and Birth Dog. It was actually quite nice. The kids had a blast having an audience as they shared the story behind each ornament and showing off all the ornaments they made in preschool. And Lexi’s Birth Uncle who is single and does not have any kids seemed to be loving it. The Birth Dog was a huge hit with the 3-year-old twins who LOVE animals and it was nice to hear about Lexi’s Birth Mom from Birth Grandma.
Open Adoption has its ups and downs but sometimes it can surprise you.